P.S I Still Love You: Letter One

(disclaimer: I don't own it.)

My Dearest Husband,

Your memorial service was today, and it was exactly as you would have wanted. And your studded box was a hit. Everyone said how stunning you looked in your new digs. We all took a shot in your honor, and sang your favorite songs. It was...you.

There were so many people there for you Gerry. Your friends, mine. My mother had tears in her eyes. I told you she didn't really hate you much anymore.

The only thing that would have made it better was if you would have been there. You were there though, weren't you? Just not the way I would have preferred. If you had been, there would have been no need for a memorial in the first place, would there?

My mom said it will take time for the hurt to ease. That I should just let the hurt come and feel it. Then when I am ready, I can start letting it go. She said she might even miss you a little. I know I will. Miss you, I mean. I already do and you haven't been gone but a few days.

I'm sorry. I am trying not to cry anymore. It seems that is all I have done since you left. The apartment seems so empty without you. I am lying on our bed...I can't sleep without you holding me. Remember how close you used to snuggle? I could feel you touching every inch of skin along my back. I need so much to feel you now.

Holly

p.s. I still love you.